Friday, April 02, 2004

Morning News Pundit 

Article No. 1: Bomb Found on Spanish Train Track

Translation: those Spaniards obviously aren't surrendering fast enough. Geez, what should they do about these terrorists?

Article No. 2: Iraqi Cleric Condemns Fallujah 'Mutilation'
As U.S. troops remain outside of Fallujah awaiting orders for an "overwhelming" response to the gruesome attacks this week, a senior Islamic cleric urged preachers on Friday to condemn the mutilation of four slain American contractors, but he did not say if those prayers should condemn the act of killing as well.
Translation: just kill the Americans, dammit. Don't let the world know we're savage animals when you do it.
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